Finding Your People at Bishop Miege

“Because, as freshmen, many of you don’t think you have it in you yet to be the person you want to be. I know I didn’t see it in myself, but the people around you will give you opportunities to feel comfortable being yourself. That is one of the best gifts Miege offers; each year, new chances open for you to explore who you really are. During my time at Miege, I have really found myself, and today I am still taking new opportunities and meeting people who reflect a side of me I never would have found otherwise.”

By: Miguel De Santos, Class of 2027

The summer after 8th grade, I was so excited for high school. Every day over the summer, I thought about the first day of school. I had so many expectations: the sports I’d play, the friends I’d make, and the memories I’d make. I created a perfect little world with nothing to do with Miege; it was all about me. I think that’s why I was disappointed at first when every expectation wasn’t met immediately. But one thing that went beyond my expectations and has slowly changed during my time at Miege is how I look at the people around me and see how they’ve changed me.

Now, as a senior, I am so impressed by my grade and the amazing accomplishments that each person has made. It’s wild to see the goals and ambitions of the people around you come to life. I’m also grateful for their efforts, which helped me achieve my goals. I’ve seen kids go from shy freshmen to outstanding leaders who give advice I wish I’d had when I started at Miege, and that’s amazing.

Because, as freshmen, many of you don’t think you have it in you yet to be the person you want to be. I know I didn’t see it in myself, but the people around you will give you opportunities to feel comfortable being yourself. That is one of the best gifts Miege offers; each year, new chances open for you to explore who you really are. During my time at Miege, I have really found myself, and today I am still taking new opportunities and meeting people who reflect a side of me I never would have found otherwise.

My first day at Miege was actually about two weeks after everyone else. I didn’t go to the amazing freshman welcome day. I didn’t do picture day, orientation, or the other super-awkward freshman fun Miege loves to provide. Our first day of freshman year was Aug. 24, 2023.

I was in the hospital getting chemo, and I remember thinking about all the times I had thought about my first day, and none of them were even close to reality. When I finally started school, I felt not just out of place, but like all eyes were on me as I walked the hallways. Starting school is hard, and showing up with a beanie and a mask every other day definitely didn’t help. I didn’t take it personally; I know I would’ve stared too, but it hurt that people formed an impression of me before I got to say a word. I wish I could explain who I was just a couple of months earlier, before I got sick.

But surprisingly, many people looked past it. Brave people who knew nothing about me but knew I deserved a chance at community made me feel welcome. I want to talk about some people who made me feel welcome at Miege — people from different years at Miege, each representing a different kind of inclusion beyond the social.

Finding your people through friendship

During my freshman year, I grew close to Isaac Frenzel almost immediately. It’s funny because each year that passes, we realize how weirdly similar we are. He can be really nice, and I’d say he’s always shown leadership. He immediately welcomed me like he had been at Miege forever. He was definitely an anchor during freshman year when I needed to ask questions about people in our grade, homework, and just life in general. Sure, it could have been anyone, and I would’ve done just fine, but finding someone at Miege who shared my goals of leadership, confidence, and uniqueness was really important to my growth as a person. As I became healthier and spent more time at school, that ability to be unapologetically me helped me build connections and reach goals I couldn’t have if I’d been too scared of what people would think.

Sophomore year I started school full-time. I took only three classes freshman year, so I was excited to make school my main priority. One person who stood out was a junior in my Spanish 1 class. I remember him giving me really formative advice about Miege and my future. I think it’s never too early to start pursuing your goals. Freshman year can feel like you’re just settling in, but you can make progress and have an impact right away. I remember Luis telling me about the Latino Association Club and saying I should check it out. I didn’t know anybody in it, and I felt like I didn’t belong because I don’t speak Spanish or because I wasn’t advocating for my people.

One day, I went, and it was amazing. I met so many kind people who genuinely wanted to do something special. Some people didn’t know any Spanish, and others weren’t even Latino but still wanted community and to help others. Today, I’m grateful to lead the club, and I think it’s an awesome community for anyone; I want it to be a place where people feel comfortable in their identity and proud to help others. At Miege, so many upperclassmen and teachers can show you opportunities that fit you, and it’s important that you at least give it a shot. Whether it’s joining football, cheer, baking club, art, robotics, or any interest you have, you will be a welcome addition and appreciated as long as you show kindness and effort.

Finding faith and friendship through Kairos

Senior year is my Kairos group. Out of all the retreats I have been to, Kairos has definitely been the most impactful. I’m not saying the other ones weren’t influential, but I think they raised my maturity level so I could fully engage by the time I came to Kairos. I knew most of the people on my retreat pretty well throughout junior year, but those three days made us all realize something. Everyone at Miege wants to know you and be friends with you, but we’re all scared to take the chance. When I came back, I realized people are just like me.

It truly opened my eyes to Miege’s community and gave me the confidence to feel comfortable around strangers. I think this value centers heavily around an important Catholic value and our Miege mission of the year: “Through Christ, for each other.” When you get to see how God has made each person with unique struggles and perspectives, and that, at the end of the day, they’re all aiming for love and peace, it becomes much easier to connect with new people. People you think are too cool or scary upperclassmen are kids who just want friends and to be appreciated. Once I saw Christ working through each person, it became easier for me to see how community can bring you closer to God.

Trusting God and growing into yourself

For me, Miege is home, and I know it doesn’t feel that way for everyone. I know how that feels; my freshman year, I didn’t feel like a complete member or even known by many people. However, I think God has given me people who have helped me understand who I truly am. Next year, wherever I end up, I know God will give me new people, and the experiences I have gained at Miege will help me trust that things will work out.

Advice is really reassuring to have, so I want to end with some. As a freshman, sophomore, junior, or even senior, don’t feel like you have to have everything figured out. You will see people around you who seem so much better than you, and you’ll realize they feel the same way. No one has it figured out. If you feel like your progress isn’t paying off, remember that small changes always beat no change.

I am a completely different person than I was freshman year, and it didn’t happen by taking giant leaps. I slowly met new people, signed up for new activities, put myself out there even when I thought I didn’t have a chance at success, and failed many times, but I have definitely gone places I would never have imagined. And I want all of you to know that teachers and friends here will help you achieve your goals.

High school is a place where you can chase your dreams and fail repeatedly without consequences, so don’t be scared when you’re excited to get back into soccer after four years and then make C team, like I did as a junior. Don’t beat yourself up when you get an F on an English assignment you thought was amazing, like I did; don’t be discouraged when you sign up for summer programs and get denied from every single one like me, or fall in love with a subject that you want to study and feel like the dumbest person in the room, like I am right now in Physics, because these are setbacks that will not hold you back if you don’t let them. Trust God when it feels like He doesn’t trust you, love others when it feels like no one understands you, and be confident when you know everyone in the room is staring at you, because you might just shine. And always smile because that is one of my favorite things about Miege: seeing people smile after I do.